For those of you that say spanking is ok (yes it bothers me a lot) I do wonder...when YOU, the adult mess up...are you ok with a caning? They do this in other countries to adults. You misbehave, you get caned. Since you believe hitting and hurting are ok...is it ok for the adults too?
Do I think that if an adult commits a crime should they be punished. yes. I do. But there are too many bleeding hearts out there and prison is a cakewalk. There is NO true punishement anymore. Sure prison is bad. BUT not bad enough.
Canning? sure. Why not. I dont have a problem with it. Although its honestly too easy for some folks. Not enough of a punishemnt. But if Prison was more suited to the crime folks wouldnt go back.
Are my kids scared of their dad? LOL no. But its a proven fact ( at least in everyone I talk to) that mom can beg, and plead, and holler and threaten, and ground. BUT when dad says "do that" in a calm voice, the kids do it. I think my husband has spanked my kids maybe three times in their lives.
But since I am the one that is the 24-7 person I get everything from "its time to wake up" to "go to bed NOW" I get 'hurry up and get dressed, put on socks, put on shoes, hurry before your ride leaves' do your homework, dont touch that, eat your supper. " The list goes on and on. And although I dont give in,I dont let them get away with murder, I still have to keep on them. and there are times when they wont mind. They feed off each other.
I was not blessed with perfect little angels. I have kids who could find a mudhole in the desert. Bring home snakes because they want to knwo what kind they are. My kids are smart asses. My kids are sweethearts. but above all my kids are kids.
Although mine dont touch a computer, they do have a TV and pm3 players. I have taken away everything. Down to the bare walls because they were acting like juvinille delinquents. They could care LESS. They have each other to play with. They read books instead. They made up games and played dress up with thier sister. They made up songs and sang them. They went outside and built a fort out of branches and pine straw. You cant take that away. They could have cared less about the toys, the TV's and all of it.
I can tell them a hundred times to pick up their room, instead they end up piling all the toys on top of their sister. Hiding her in a mountain. I tell them they have 10 minutes. or they get their butts busted. they clean it.
I dont whip them daily. But yes, I find it is a great disipline tool. I am sorry you dont agree with it.
But I seriously, and I am not being a smart ass here, I seriously invite anyone to deal with mine and not say that I am doing all I can to make them good upstanding citizens.
They are well loved, they know they are loved. They are the most affectionate kids I have ever seen. They are bright and outgoing. And they test every limit you can ever think of. I get hugs when they wake up, when they leave for school, when they walk in the door, just because I am standing there, when I cook what they like, when I cook what they hate, when I tell them to go to bed, when they DO go to bed, when they call me in thre 30 minutes AFTER they go to bed.
I scream and I holler, some folks dont have to. And God Bless you. But I will NEVER say my kids are perfect. They are not. But they do say Yes ma'am and No ma'am. They say Thank you, and treat others with respect. Just not each other.
And yes, when my kids get rowdy and I am on the phone I put them in the corner. I tell them to stop, they continue to act like wild indians. I put them in the corner. What is so bad about that? honestly? I should NOT talk on the phone because they are awake? They know better. They just get all beside themselves and act like idiots. Its not every time I get on the phone. But it happens. THey have a 6th sense when it comes to the phone ringing. They can be playing (not quiet, cause they are seldom quiet) and boom its time to fight, or swing from the ceiling.
I would love it if I could take away a computer and they would straiten up. ROFLMAO. mine could care LESS> the outside is a MUCH better place than cyberspace for them. They will watch 1/2 a movie and then start to BE the movie. They go and do.
I have found very few things that my kids will loose and it will affect them. Hunting is theONLY thing I was ever able to take away that affected them. and it did great. But thats only once a year.
The school has my permission to whip them. LEts see. One of my boys got in trouble for nto sitting down when his teacher had told them to. He got sent to the principals office. He had already had his color changed that day for trying to slap at a bee in line and getting out of line, laughing when someone passed gas, proving he COULD jump over a desk, and something else. He was just being a brat that day. His principal called me. He had NEVER been to the office before. So I told the principal to do what ever it took. He sent him to ISS. (in school suspension) to see if it would put a scare in him. The kid LOVED it. the next day he did the same thing to go to the office. It was quieter in there, he could get his work done and then sleep (not supposed to, but he can sleep sitting up) or read, or write a story. I told the principal that from here on out there was no more ISS. Whip him and send him back to class. He hasnt gone back to the principal since.
my kids are learning concequences. They sass me, they have concequences. They cuss, they have them. You were able to take something away and it worked. I am not. I am glad it works foryou. It doesnt for me.
To be a little in fear of your parents is a good thing I think. Not fearful to the point of not being yourself. But
You need to respect athority.
I dont steal, or kill, or what ever. For one, I was taught it was wrong. I knew if I ever did it I would get a butt whoopin. It was known. I never even thought to cross that line. BUT I also fear, and respect the law. I know if I decide to beat the living snot out of that person that almost hit my car in the parking lot cause they were driving like an idiot, I will go to jail. So I refrain..
I dont have perfect kids, I am not a perfect mom, and honestly I dont want them. And I dont want to be. Life would be boring. I would be bored. We live in a large family, we are always picking and laughing, and hollering and everyone here laughs until they cant breathe at least once a day. My kids are happy. They are fun to be around. And when I have a complete stranger walk up and tell me that my child just helped them clean up a mess they made on isle 7, I KNOW that I am doing something right. (the stranger made, not my kid. )
Now that I have defended myself. ANd wrote a book I will stop.